DAY FIVE: ALONE AGAIN, NATURALLY

30 Days of Self Love
Day Five: Alone again, naturally

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Yesterday Ollie and I woke up to the sun shining bright. In Colorado, a state with more than 300 sunny days per year, it’s easy to take it for granted, but not here in the Pacific Northwest. It has been raining so hard for the past few days I thought I was going to have to call Noah to build another ark.
 
So it was a pleasant surprise to see a yellow object glowing in the sky, and maybe I cut you guys a little short on writing yesterday. Basically, Ollie was howling at the door, “Let’s gooooo!” So we did…
 
Ollie and I drove from beach to beach before our cabin was ready. We played in the sand. Ollie found some other dogs to frolic with. Oregon beaches are super dog friendly and a leash wasn’t in sight, which was welcome news. Let’s just say Master Ollie does not enjoy a leash…that’s for dogs, he says. Clearly he is not dog (shush, don’t tell him).
 
We shared a really fresh fish and chips lunch and headed to the grocery store to stock up. Tea in place of wine and vegan in place of the road/ party food I had been living on for the past few days.
 
For those of you who do not know, I dream walk people back with their soul in my full-bodied soul session. Like dream walking a child born into this world or facilitating a soul exiting physical form, I walk humans back to their souls. This usually happens in the dream state, and I do not drink alcohol or eat animal products during this time to keep the energy clear from interference.
 
As I have taken two weeks off from any client work, I am my own client. Dream walking Lauren and Sar’h, the voice of my soul, together once again. But aren’t they already together? Yes AND there is always so much more to explore!
 
Furthermore, I would say the most interesting internal discovery as of late is the lines between human and soul and facets have become quite thin. It’s not so easy to distinguish between the many that make up SELF. Integration is the natural progression, so it feels quite good to have the lines blurred. Maybe that’s why it is so hard to go into a house full of thirty people! I can’t simply pull out the human facet and put it forth for the party anymore. That old trick feels much too fragmented. It’s concepts and realizations like these that I hope to dive deep into during the next week.
 
Ollie and I found our cabin about 3 p.m. It’s absolutely perfect. The windows look out to the gently roaring Pacific Ocean, and neon green garden paths weave the property, where Ollie is allowed to roam free. He’s in heaven after being in motels for the past week.
 
Also, I’m going to be honest. I spent yesterday completely ‘energetically hung over’ from the shamanic gathering. It was not the single beer I had at lunch or the one I had with dinner. It was too much energy in one place, and many people not aware enough to hold responsibility for their energy. Judgement free - how can I judge when the awareness is not even present enough to think about energetic dynamics.
 
At home, I am spoiled. Every single friend there has taken and/or taught the Crimson Circle’s Sexual Energy School, which is not a requirement for mastery but sure helps bring some much needed awareness to energetic management.
 
I think the majority of all of you reading this have taken the school, but if not there’s one coming up in April. You can read the description HERE and see if it calls to you. I will say I also have friends who have never taken the school and manage their energy like the masters they are. I'd say that is the exception, rather than the rule.
 
For those of us Shaumbra who hang out together, we can easily tell who has taken it by how they manage their personal energy, replenishing themselves from within rather than grasping at external sources of energy. It becomes plain as day to watch it. But you are all masters of self and can determine if something like that is right for you, so back on topic…
 
If you watched the last Shoud, you might know the term ‘energetic hangover’ came from Adamus. Yesterday I felt I could barely function in the human world. I even wore my baseball cap inside the grocery store to block the energy of other humans. I’m all about making eye contact and chatting with strangers 99% of the time. Not yesterday. I was on OPE (Other Peoples’ Energy) overload!!! I haven't felt that in ages...not at this level...
 
So what does a master do when they are energetically hung over in a marijuana-legal state? They start a fire, get a little stoned, open up the cabin doors to allow the roar of the ocean to permeate the house. They breathe a deep sigh of relief and sense gratitude for their magical cabin creation for the next week. It should be an interesting journey into the blurred lines of self. I look forward to what I might I discover as I dance in this grand space of awareness. I am so grateful I gave myself this gift of solitude. It truly is a pleasure to know me.