This is an excerpt from the 30 Days of Self Love experience happening over on the New Energy Creator Patreon page. Sar'h says there are certain keys to unlock conscious creativity - self-love, operating beyond duality, and using gravity in your creative favor. The series focused on the first. Thanks everyone who has joined us for the ride as we finish up the last five days. The next series will focus on "The Creation Senses: Moving Beyond the Senses of Perception." Anyone is welcome to join our Patreon community at anytime. We're having some excellent discussions over there in a safe, private space. Here's Day 25...P.S. It's not been all love and light - promise....
For me, the journey of self-love or perceiving myself and my surroundings through the lens of love has been all about getting to know myself. I do not experience self-love as being about 'loving' your imperfect body or personality traits; it is so much deeper than that, as you are aware.
When you are in the deep end of awareness, when you find you are bathing in the self-love sense, what your body looks like, your human personality, your relationships, your bank account all seem like tiny details in the GRANDNESS of your being. It's all a distraction from the space of wholeness.
In my experience, I did not discover my own grandness until I had the courage to get to know myself. Not just my human self, but all of the planets, stars, and dark matter that make up the universe of me.
I'd like to think there's plenty left to explore because I don't want to leave this experience. Ever. It feels way too fantastic. Should I run out of universe to explore, I will create another just to keep this energetic orgasm flowing.
The orgasmic experience, for me, lies in the sweetness of experiencing wholeness, in sensing the completeness of my being. It is remembering the FRUIT OF THE ROSE - which can not be described in words, only experience sensually.
It's not that I had to summon the courage to explore the depths of SELF. I didn't need will power to have the audacity to get to know all of mySELF. It came from a place of deep passion, an innate desire of the soul to experience self-love in its most expanded state.
I cleared my path to completeness through the song of self-awareness, with staccato notes of revelations and realizations, that my human self followed when there was nothing left to guide us.
Once I caught the bug - once the pilot light of passion for SELF was lit - nothing else mattered. I became singularly focused on SELF. I began to desire my own essence more than I ever longed for another person. It was strange to witness the internal shift. Being with another person was nice for a time. Yet, it pales in comparison to the sense of union I am experiencing now within me.
This sense of love, of union, of awareness, is GRANDER than anything I've ever experienced in my lifetimes on this planet, maybe anywhere else in all of creation.
Robert Frost said "Earth's the right place for love; I don't know where it's likely to go better." I've read that line a million times in my life. It is from my favorite poem, "Swinger of Birches." I couldn't comprehend it until now, yet as a teenager, I knew the poem held the secrets of the universe within its words.
Now these are just words backed up by senses, filled with passion, the scent of the rose placed between each sentence. Sar'h sings the notes of love in my ears. Perhaps you hear it too? Perhaps you too can feel the passion ignited within yourSELF - a fire that's been burning for ages.
"I'd like to get away from earth awhile
And then come back to it and begin over.
May no fate willfully misunderstand me
And half grant what I wish and snatch me away
Not to return. Earth's the right place for love:
I don't know where it's likely to go better.
I'd like to go by climbing a birch tree,
And climb black branches up a snow-white trunk
Toward heaven, till the tree could bear no more,
But dipped its top and set me down again.
That would be good both going and coming back.
One could do worse than be a swinger of birches."
Full poem can be found here: https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems-and-poets/poems/detail/44260
Dreaming. It’s such an amazing part of being a human. We can fly in our dreams, experiencing the absence of Earth’s gravity. Dreams can shut off our brains long enough to allow us to work out non-linear, creative solutions for our waking lives, and often process or integrate issues seemingly too heavy, too dark for the daylight.
Many people, myself included, have experienced talking with loved ones or pets who have left the physical world in our dreams, gaining a sense of peace after the loss. Dreams can warn us about people or situations, or alert us to a surprise or shift headed our way. The possibilities are endless in the dream state!
As I describe in Becoming Sar’h: Book One, a dream is what made me finally make the decision to leave my marriage, which was no longer serving my soul journey. All the facts in the world were not enough evidence, for lack of a better term, to leave, but the sensation I received from a dream told me without a doubt that it was time to move on. The dream occurred in May. I left my marriage that June. Four months later, I had an awakening experience that would shift my entire journey in this life and become the topic of my first published book.
Similarly, my friend, Alice, told me it was a dream that triggered her leaving her career in medicine. In her dream, she was swimming in the lake at the bottom of a huge canyon. She realized she was alone in this magical place as she became aware of the stunning beauty of the canyon.
“When I woke up, I knew I had told myself (through the dream), that this particular part of my journey was mine alone and that it would yield beauty unlike any I had ever experienced,” Alice told me. A few months later, she went through an evolutionary soul experience, which is another story for another time.
Lucid Dreaming, Remembering and Analyzing Dreams
Lucid dreaming is the term used to describe being aware that you are dreaming, while dreaming, and even being able to make choices to shift the course of the dream. It was something I first read about as a teenager and knew I had mastered when I had that panic-filled college exam dream – you know the one where you realize you have an exam you did not study for and then you are desperately trying to figure out what to do. Instead of doing the normal panic routine, I realized what was going on in my dream and decided to find friends and invite them out to wine and dinner. I sat there in the dream, drinking wine and enjoying my friends’ company instead. What did it mean? Not much except the simple realization that I am the creator of my reality both awake and asleep.
That brings me to the next point. Not every dream is going to mean something or symbolize something in your waking life. I call this story burn off. It’s simply all the stories in all the realities you exist in, playing out. Story lines that you did not choose, that make no sense in waking life, stories that do not belong to you or your journey. To me, story burn off feels like a release of sorts.
And, as I spoke of above, there are the times when you know the dream holds a message. You wake up, recall the dream, and deep down inside you know it needs to be examined. Sometimes a dream dictionary like Tony Crisp’s will help point you in the right direction. Other times, it is something for you to decode yourself – at the soul level.
My friend, Tess, said it quite eloquently, “I’d say the dream state has been a very personal, unique experience. I found writing my dreams down immediately upon awakening to be very helpful. Otherwise they would fade in moments. Then as time went on, I became more adept at unlocking my own symbolism that I received.”
Tess also said sometimes she would ask her soul a question and wait patiently to receive the answer in the dream state. “But usually when least expected,” she added. “So one has to be patient and let (the question) go first."
On that note, here are my tips for remembering your dreams and lucid dreaming:
ASPECT INTEGRATION IN THE DREAM STATE
For those who really want to dive into the deep end of awareness…
For those of you looking to go even deeper in the dream state, I cannot talk about dreams without talking about aspects. As I wrote in Becoming Sar’h: Book One, aspects are identities our souls created in the past to answer the question, “Who am I?” They often take on their own voice and cause chaos and confusion in our lives if we are not conscious of them. Sometimes we create aspects to fill roles in certain situations, like daughter, wife, or business owner. Additionally, past life aspects or identities come into play and even ones created in dreams and other realities.
When we are unconscious of them, aspects can drag us in all directions. They can literally haunt us. Sometimes, when I thought I was dealing with a ghost or earth-bound spirit, it turned out to be my own aspect haunting me. Most importantly, instead of trying to run off rogue aspects, usually they need to be invited in for integration. The dream state is a common place to integrate aspects because it can be an easier place to do so. Lindsay, who recently shared with me the following story, knows this all too well…
One night, Lindsay found herself in a lucid dream where she was in a dark, windowless attic of a house, surrounded by unopened boxes. Her husband and brother were there with her in the dream. While exploring the attic, they noticed a doorway hidden behind the boxes that had been sealed shut and decided to break it open and explore what was beyond the door.
They entered a room with more unopened boxes, but in this room there was a window with light beaming in. Lindsay described, “We knew we were there for something important but we didn't know what.”
Suddenly, coming up from the floor, Lindsay heard a terrifying, demonic voice, one that came from an energetic being that she couldn't see. However, she could feel it shout, "DO YOU REMEMBER ME?"
The energy began flying around the room and attacking Lindsay, trying to get into her body.
“I was scared shitless, and I tried everything I could think of to send this evil being away and keep it from getting into me. Nothing was working. In desperation, I called out to Archangel Michael to send this evil thing packing, but even that didn't work. Michael did not show up to help. I then realized that no one was going to help me. In that moment of panic and mortal terror, the demon flew into my body, and I suddenly woke up in a cold sweat with the most intense fear I have ever felt surging through my body.”
Lindsay said she lay in bed for a few hours breathing and shaking through an incredible amount of fear.
“Lying there I realized that demonic energy was me. That was an aspect of my soul that was ready to come home, to integrate into me. That was why it went into my body."
Lindsay added that she was beyond thankful that she had done the aspect integration while sleeping.
“That aspect would have scared me so badly while I was awake, I probably would have thought I was losing my mind. I was also glad that I had two people I love and feel very safe around with me in the dream state while it was happening.”
Lindsay said this experience reinforced her deep inner knowing that as a soul, we’ve had all sorts of experiences. “From the most saintly, pious human to the most evil, fearsome expression of darkness, we have experienced all of it. There's nothing we are not or have not been,” she added.
What an experience to show her – and us through her story – that we, as souled beings, contain everything – light, dark and everything in between. It reminds me of the quote from Ascended Master Tobias, “A denial of the dark is a denial of half of yourself, if not more” (Crimson Circle).
For more of Lindsay’s stories, you can visit her website here.
IF YOU WANT TO GO EVEN DEEPER…
Interested in exploring aspects more? I highly recommend the Crimson Circle organization’s Aspectology School Online February 24-26 or check the website at www.CrimsonCircle.com to see if there is a class in your area.
Whether you are working with lucid dreaming or aspect integration, I am here to support you. You can sign up for a soul session, in-person or via Skype, on my website NewEnergyCreator.com. If you have questions, please fill out the contact form, and I will get back with you shortly.
In the meantime, keep dreaming – both awake and asleep!
Lauren and Sar'h
This video blog covers: What in the world do you mean by conscious creativity?
What is the SOUL and its purpose?
How to be a COURAGEOUS CREATOR in the face of fear.